【沪江网校版】2011年12月英语四级整卷汇总(更新中)

Part I Writing

【标准版】Nothing Succeeds Without a Strong Will

Nothing runs smoothly in our life. To achieve things successfully, a strong will is essential. Life is like a Marathon. Many people can’t get to the terminal. This is not because they are lack of vitality but because their will of success is not strong enough.

To take quitting smoking as an example, some regard it as a piece of cake. They make up their minds to quit it in the morning, but in the evening they feel that the smell of cigarettes is tempting. Their throats are sore, their mouths are thirsty, and their hands are shaking. After the painful mental struggle, they tell themselves that “One cigarette is enough. Just take one, and the next day I will quit it.” By doing this, they surrender to their weak will. In the end, they have quitted smoking “a hundred times”, but in no time they succeed.

Just like quitting smoking, nothing succeeds without a strong will. To be successful in one’s life, a strong will means that you know where you go and you will persist on the road you choose. Undoubtedly success belongs to those who overcome their weak will and who hang in there until the last minute.

【文章点评】
本文属于话题类作文，只看题目 “Nothing Succeeds without a strong will”考生会觉得比较抽象，难以下手。细看题目说明中给出了提示，要求考生结合戒烟屡次不成功的幽默引语对该话题进行分析阐述。

总体来说，这是一篇“中等偏上”的考生作文。本文先点题指出“坚强意志”的重要性；第二段从反面举例阐述——具体描写了意志不坚定者的心理活动，阐述为什么会戒烟失败；最后从戒烟延伸到生活中的其他事情，并复述坚强意志的内涵，点题收尾。

总体上来看，文章思路清晰，采用了生动的比喻和形象的心理描写，语言流畅，用语地道。但一些重复表达（如第二段和第三段中的weak will）显得单调，可用shaky ones, weak-willed persons，the strong-willed等灵活表达。在备考中，多积累不同表达，相信会写出更生动的文章。

在论述上，叙述略显罗嗦。第二段心理描写过多，虽然流畅生动，但却使这篇考场作文超过了规定字数，反而成为失分点，这一点要引以为戒。

【高分版】Nothing Succeeds Without a Strong Will

As we have read from above, quitting-smoking seems easy, but in reality it is rarely achieved. There is something provoking and interesting in this paradox, just because sword does not wear the stone as dripping water does.

The ability to do something over and over again in a short time may imply its easiness, but in a long run, a lifetime maybe, things turn out to be quite the opposite. Also, as is often the case, one may have obtained all the tools and opportunities to achieve something, but in the end they still fail due to the will shortage.

So how could we avoid the dilemma? Here is the prime condition of success: will and perseverance. Concentrate you energy, thought and mind exclusively on the business in which you are engaged, hang on in there and be patient, for, as Emerson put it, no one can cheat you out of your ultimate success but yourself.

【文章点评】
本次四级作文探讨的话题是成功与毅力之间的关系，话题不算新，一般考生对此都比较熟悉，所以对考生来说难度不大。写好这篇作文，需要抓住两点，一是紧跟题目要求，即对上述幽默性的话语做出评论，二是在评论的基础上要亮出自己的观点。

范文开头第一句即一针见血地对上述幽默性话语做出总结性概括，即戒烟看似简单实则很难，随后指出该话语本质上是一个悖论，并且以一个“水滴石穿”的俗语来指出困难所在，这句也是本文的一个亮点，体现作者在西方俗语方面丰富的知识储备。

第二段作者则进一步深入分析该话语，指出做某事在短期看来很容易，长期来看，恰恰相反，人们做事的结果也因此总是失败，原因则在最后一句点出：缺乏毅力。

第三段作者进一步给出了自己的观点，告诉大家如何避免陷入这种两难境地：首要条件即需要坚强的意志和长期的坚持。最后再以艾默生的一句名言 “没人能够骗你远离你最终的成功，除非你自己承认失败”来总结全文，切中主题，铿锵有力。

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